Welcome to 2013

Welcome to 2013, Yes I am well aware that a full month of the new year as almost slipped by. That pretty much sums up how 2013 is going to go. 2013 says " Faythe, get your running shoes on because this is going to be a race to the finish".

I sit here this morning with a cup of liquid crack aka coffee withe Hazelnut IE and reflect on my New Years resolution. Oh, I see you shaking your head! Here goes another one of those self improvement speechless about weight loss and goals. Many of my friends on face book posted that they weren't setting a resolution for the New Year because they never keep it and well it sets you up for failure. I believe that's a COP OUT! for not setting yourself up for success. I'm a single mother, what if I constantly never set goals for my children, never set expectations or goals for them because I didn't want them to fail?

You only fail if you quit! We are all human and heck you might fall off the horse a few times. You might binge on that chocolate delicate gouache or those chicken enchiladas but you only fail if you quit the whole year.

So my WELCOME TO 2013 SPEECH is, even though its a month in, set yourself up for SUCCESS this year. If it's your body, mind, spirit, or finances make a plan and if you fall of track, dust your a** off and start again!


My personal resolution this year was attitude, attitude in my personal and professional life. Speaking positive affirmations into my life and my children's on a daily basis. Oh I would like to shed a few extra pounds that aren't considered " baby weight" since my youngest is two but this year I decided to pick ONE resolution to change my life.

I'd like to share this saying with you

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on my life.  

Attitude, to me is more important that the past, than education, than money, than circumstance, than failures, than successes, than what other people thing or say or do. 

It is more important than appearances, giftness, or skill. It will make or break a company, a church, or YOUR HOME!

The remarkable and undeniable things is we have a choice every single day regarding the attitude we will embrace for the whole day. We cannot change our past, cannot change the fact that people will act a certain way toward us. We cannot change the inevitable.

The only things we can do is take our own lives by the wheel, the only thing we have control over, and that is our attitude.

I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.

And so it is with you..........

Changes....

 

When we find ourselves going through any kind of change in our lives, our natural response may be to tense up on the physical, mental, or emotional level. We may not even notice that we have braced ourselves against a shift until we recognize the anxiety, mood swings, or general worried feeling toward the unknown that usually results. There are positive ways to move through change without pushing it away, however, or attempting to deny that it is happening. Since change will occur in almost every aspect of our lives, we can learn to make our response to it an affirmative one of anticipation, welcoming the new while releasing the past with grace.

One thing we can do is change our perspective by changing the labels we use to identify our feelings. We can reinterpret feelings of anxiety as the anxious butterflies that come with eager expectation. With this shift, we begin to look for the good that is on its way to us. Though we may only be able to imagine the possibilities, when we acknowledge that good is there for us to find, we focus our energy on joyful anticipation and bring it into our experience while allowing the feelings to carry us forward.

We can also choose to do a ceremony to allow our emotions to process. Every culture has created ceremonies to help people make the transition from one phase of life to the next. We can always create a ceremony too, perhaps by burning written thoughts and worries to watch the smoke carry them away, thereby releasing them, or we can welcome new endeavors by planting flowers or trees. Some ceremonial activities such as a farewell send-off or housewarming party, we may do automatically. Society also has built-in ceremonies, like graduation and weddings, which may satisfy the need we feel. Sometimes the shift from denial to acceptance is all that is needed to ease our anxiety, allowing us to bring our memories with us as we move through nervousness to joyful excitement about the good to come.

One word out of thousands

 I tend to take things really personally when someone says something negative or leaves a negative comment on the blog or posts something on face book. I tend to wear my emotions on my sleeve and so that one negative thing can effect my whole day if I let it. My attitude, my energy level, and how I react to people around me. 

Isn't it weird that we internalize the negative affirmations in our life way more than the positive words in our lives?

There is more negative in this world than positive let's face it, even all over the news, reality TV, and movies it's hard to find things that are positive. I am a firm believer that we have to keep pouring the positive in our lives. Out of the heart the mouth speaks, so when we pour positive in, we speak it out!

Something I do is keep a "positive journal" where I save every email, positive comment, note from my brides, birthday cards, and any positive affirmations. When I have a down day I can pull it out and read all the positive. Anything positive goes in this special book!

I think it's so important as a parent to give my children verbal praise on a daily basis. How many times during the day do I say no, stop, quit, don't do that? A LOT with two little boys. Just like myself for every negative word they need 10 to outshine it. My focus of the last month has been to give both my boys verbal affirmation. If they do something good without me asking them to , I say " you are such a good boy, I am so proud of you". or " thank you so much for doing the right thing", " you are so smart".

Seeing there little faces SHINE when I praise them is priceless but my heart does the same thing when someone praises me or gives me a positive " good job". Since I have been focusing on the positive I am having to correct them less and less. All I have to is " do you want to make mommy happy"? then this is the way we should do that.

I also have been blessed with an amazing guy who daily tells me how proud he is of me and what an amazing business owner and mother I am. I have noticed how it motivates me and likewise I try and make an effort every day to tell him something that I am proud of or a reason why I love him.

Just as positive can motivate, encourage, and lift someone up, we must be so careful that we don't speak a negative affirmation over our children or spouse. It  can crush some one's spirit, words spoken can never be taken back.

I encourage each of you to save the positive in your life, pour in the uplifting, encourage your children and spouse through positive affirmations and praise!!! 

CAT FIGHT in my living room!!!

CAT FIGHT IN MY LIVING ROOM!!!

So, today was so busy and I just got caught up in life. Ever do that? just get so caught up that all of a sudden you are like " it's 10pm and where did the day go?

In life there are so many things set up as distractions from what really matters.

The world throws negative things at us from many angles, through the music we listen to, the books we read, the tv shows we watch. FULL of negative drama that clouds are minds.

I sat here doing office work at my kitchen table with my babes asleep and the tv across in the living room on low, with Housewives of New Jersey playing. Trying to concentrate on paperwork and finally I just felt the tension in my shoulders, I felt panicked, frustrated, and angry. FOR NO REASON.....and then I looked up and realized that the tv across the room the drama going on in the show, the arguing, cussing, and anger between those ladies was IN MY HOME. 

Now I certainly wouldn't let these ladies come into my home and start a fight like that in my living room would I? and yet that is EXACTLY what I was doing. The negative spirit and spirit of confusion, frustration, and anger was in my living room. 

What kind of energy are you letting into your life through media? Are you letting it control the atmosphere of your home? Of your children?

I'm not saying its a bad thing to watch these things ( kinda an addict myself) BUT what I am saying is HOW MUCH time are you allowing for these things to be in your life? and are you putting the POSITIVE in your home as well?? 

Fill your home with positive media, joy, and happiness!!!

xoxo

Faythe

Give change a bear hug!!!

Giving change a bear hug!!!

There is a positive you can find in every situation in life that happens. 

This summer has been a huge journey for me, so many changes in life, and doors that are being opened for my business and family!

Despite what some may think, I do not like change. I have ordered the same thing at Starbucks for the last 10 years and have certain patterns and ways I do things. I wake up each morning and grab a  Dr. Pepper and Coffee, double fisting caffeine first thing in the am. I also like to take hot baths but shower after. (Something about sitting in your own dirt and then getting out.... just isn't my thing lol). Ive worn the same bath and body lotion and spray since I was 16. Every summer I buy a pair of target black flip flops. You get the point. Just not a girl who likes BIG changes.

Sometimes God forces us to get into a place that the bottom of our lives is literally falling out, so we look for a  change in our circumstances. 

We can be so focused on trying to pry back open the doors God has closed in our lives, that we miss seeing the ones that He has opened for us. Doors that possibly have bigger and better things in them for us or we forget maybe he closed doors to protect us.

Recently at the beginning of the year I was laying in bed one night after my little ones FINALLY went to sleep. One of those nights where we read " Go Dog Go" twice and had to thank God in our prayers for everything " thank you God for the nana and papa, and the ceiling , and the floor, and the pillow and my binky and my purple truck" lol Alex just wouldn't stop and it took an hour or so to get him asleep. At that point I kinda dozed off for a minute. In that minute I had this amazing concept for an expansion and an additional business. I woke up 5 minutes later and thought on it for awhile. Then shrugged and like I did, I put the ideas asleep.

Until the beginning of Spring when some personal challenges in my life forced me to take a step back and look at my future. I wanted to spend more time with my children and less time working 70+ hours a week. I hadn't had a weekend off in months and was at the burn out point. So again this little idea in my head popped back up but this time I didn't slam the door on the idea.

I guess God was preparing me for the call I would get from investors pitching my the idea of taking an Editor position. He was preparing me for the idea of taking on change in my life with a positive lioness attitude! because honey, that is the last think I EVER dreamed I would be doing....me single mommy to two baby boys? the lady who shaves one leg one night and the other leg the next night because within 5 minutes of stepping in the shower one of two little voices will be at the door saying " mommy"? (Come on, I know you other moms know what I'm talking about).

Now I'm being pitched a business proposal for a prestigious put together editor position???

Well BRING IT ON!!

I guess my point in today's posting is to encourage other people to not let their situation or fear stop them from a dream God has given them. NOTHING and I mean NOTHING can stop you from having a dream but YOU! So get out of your own way!

Just like Esther in the Bible took on a huge challenge in her life. Facing fear with courage and walking in faith.

Everyone goes through crap in their lives. Every person has break down moments. Every person has bad things happen to them. Every person makes mistakes.

 These situations show you, who you really are. 

You can either give up or you can embrace change with a bear hug.

 

xoxo

Faythe

ps. I am inspired now and beginning a Bible study based on the book of Esther and invite you to log in daily and comment

YOU ARE NOT ALONE

I want you to know that you are not alone. Darkness wants you to believe you are all alone, but you are not. You think no one understands how you feel, but that is not true.

In addition to God being with you, many other people know how you feel and understand what you are experiencing mentally and emotionally.

" Many evils  confront the righteous, but the Lord delivers him our of them all" Psalms 34:19

There are so many examples in the Bible of the afflictions and attacks of the righteous and the Lord delivered every single one of them.When you make PROGRESS in life Satan often brings affliction to discourage you and will try to make you feel alone BUT what Satan intends for our harm, God will work to our good. Anything negative or bad can be turned to good if we see it through God's eyes and not the eyes of our flesh or out of emotion. 

Think of David and Saul , Sharach, Meschach, and Abednego, and Daniel in the Lions Den

All of these people found that God was faithful. I have also experienced His goodness and faithfulness. I was in a terribly car wreck two years ago when I was 9 months pregnant with Alex ( below are images). I will share the whole story at a later time but you can see from the wreck, which by the way was a mini van before the crash. I have had a baby in the NICU and I have lost a baby girl, but nonetheless in each case God has delivered me and provided answers but there was a time of waiting on God and staying in prayer. 

As we know afflictions come upon all of us.  We all experience a certain amount of grief and loneliness in life from time to time, but we are not alone. 

GOD WILL WORK IT FOR OUR GOOD

God is good and He is faithful. Last year I encountered a major emotional shock that separated me from many people and things dear to me. God wanted me to move on but I was not obeying Him. God was working for my good, even though I could not see the good at the time. When I would not move, God moved me and some of the people in my life. I realize that it was one of he best things that ever happened to me but at the time I thought my whole world was falling apart and everything in life was going wrong. I wasn't sure I would recover from this hurt.

Death and divorce are not the only devastating losses people face. Losing a longtime relationship or career that has been important to you will be very traumatic.Being sick or having an injury that keeps you from doing a sport or hobby you enjoy can be very hard emotionally. Actually, losing anyone or anything that is important to us is hard.

My complete recovery has taken nearly a year but I have definite progress throughout that time. Something that finally helped me be healed of the major pain was an understanding that on this earth we might never understand the " spiritual ties". ( I will be posting about that tomorrow)

So my point to this post is that YOU ARE NOT ALONE....when you cry in the shower, know that at least one other person in the world does ( me), when you  curl up in bed after a long day and think that you are living without purpose, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. When you think no one would care if you weren't here, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. When you think everything you do for your children, spouse , or work isn't appreciated YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

Its finding the power to stay in prayer and realize that you are under attack. Realize that God is working for your good.

Just felt I needed to say these things....BIG HUGS

FAYTHE

Open Book

Walking by faith has seemed to be what I have been doing for the last couple years daily.

Recently it has to my attention that  my integrity was attacked through social media platforms on face book from an ex partner and others, choosing not to come to me privately but to use this attack to bully what I stand for and who I am. When I found out the source it was really no surprise and also the reason why I released her as a business partner.  I will not get into the details of such things that have been construed by this source, except to say they are not true, people that talk about others without basis, are always guilty of something, maybe the same things or worse but I will not lower myself to such a low level and shall leave that to my competition. It is after all no real surprise for it is always those you try to help that end up doing the most ugly things to those that help them. The lies are a waste of my time and baseless.  There is a reason that I no longer have a partner in my business, a reason I choose not to work with this particular group of artists and vendor women. I have grounded my business and my family on integrity and faith and that will be how I continue as I move forward with my business. I will only surround myself and network with businesses and vendors who share the same goal of integrity.

The most important thing to me are my clients, not my competitors.  My clients are what matters to me and their individual satisfaction. My family is what matters to me, providing for my beautiful little boys.

I'm defending myself only by saying that from the beginning my clients have been satisfied. I have had my share of Bridezillas lol and one can't always make everyone 100% happy, but over all I have had the most amazing clients and have enjoyed working with them so very much. I only know of three clients in over 220 clients over the years who had any issues, which to me is a great success.What business can say that out of a couple hundred clients? Only three brides have not given full five star reviews. I'm human, not perfect, take responsibility for those reviews or issues, and would question any business person that had A+ across the board. I love my clients, I have always been there for them and will continue to put them first.

Have I been hurt through this? Absolutely, to a level I did not dream could happen!!! But, I still love these people and don't wish them ill...Mostly, I feel sorry for those who need to draw attention to themselves by slandering and bullying me.................. Construing one lie after the next lie, then finding others to gang up and become "a mean girls club". Their marketing ( " don't hire her, she's blah blah blah, I'm warning you...blah blah....hire me...pick me pick me....over here" ). That is not the way to do business. I think that their behavior in these actions, shows people the very truth,  it is a direct reflection of how these people treat others, and tells their real character and why I refuse to work with them. This intern, has caused much anger toward me personally hence the attacks.

So my truth is here, I am an open book. You want answers to any questions you have?? I will meet you, most gladly, meet  you for a cup of coffee , I am open......moving forward, staying positive, and putting my clients and family first. At least at this point in my life I know who I can trust, work with, and be close friends with.

Yours Truly  and Blessings,
Faythe